Lessons of the Three Weeks

Fair Warning: This one's going to ramble a bit...Sorry.

The Three Weeks will arrive next week. We're going to fast, have 21 days of no music, no shaving (for the guys, anyway), no haircuts, no simchas. The last nine days of those three weeks, at least for Ashkenazim, there will be no eating meat or drinking wine, either (not that I drink wine anyway - yuck!). Then, on the final day, on Tish'a B'Av, we're going to sit on the floor, cry and mourn the tragedies that have befallen us over the last 3300+ years. When it's over, we'll go about our business and eventually start getting ready for Rosh Hashana.

Very nice. Even touching. But what meaning does all this have? For almost 2000 years, since the destruction of the second Bais HaMikdash, we've been doing this year after year after year. And there seems to be no end in sight. Sure, we hope every day that Moshiach will come. Many of us even believe the Geulah has already started with the creation of the State of Israel and seeing frightening prophecies coming alive.

BUT WHAT DOES IT MEAN? Chazal gave us many reasons why the tragedies of Shiv'a Asar B'Tammuz and Tish'a B'Av took place. I'd like to examine two of them and see how far we've come fixing these problems over the last 2000 years.

1. The Bais HaMikdash was destroyed because of Sin'as Chinam - senseless hatred of Jews toward one another. Well, it's been nearly 2000 years, and that hatred doesn't seem to have gone away. I'm not even going to touch any other form or Judaism but Orthodox (and yes, this also excludes the Chareidi/Yeshivish world). Look at us! Rarely do two sect of Orthodox Judaism get along with each other. Rarely do Yeshivas with different outlooks see eye to eye. This person isn't frum "enough." That one is "too" frum.

Come one! Who cares how one dresses or what one eats? Are they following halacha? Are they eating kosher and keeping Shabbos and Taharah HaMishpacha? Do they learn Torah at regular times? Are they part of your overall city/town/village community? Yes, they are. Sometimes we don't necessarily have reason to like one another, and sometimes we even might have reason to dislike one another, but the Bais HaMikdash will only be rebuilt through Ahavas Chinam. You don't like how that person davens? Love him anyway. He may be saying different words in a different order, but who cares? He may eat Kitniyos on Pesach (lucky guy!!), but he is not eating chametz.

2. The Navi (Yirmiyahu) asked God - why did you destroy the Bais HaMikdash? God answered because the Jews had left His Torah and it ways. For the first Bayis, this is a great answer. Yes, they were idol-worshippers, acted immorally, and were murderers. But what about the second Bayis, the Medrash asks? Everyone was "frum" at that time! Answer the Medrash because they didn't learn Torah. But of course they did, is the incredulous reply. Yes, says the Medrash, but they didn't say Bircas HaTorah. Huh? says the Medrash? Of course they did. Ah, but they didn't mean it. They learned Torah as an academic exercise. THEY DID NOT INTERNALIZE THEIR LEARNING. Torah was essentially a fun thing to do and use to exercise the brain, not to internalize its wisdom and make it part of oneself.

Have we learned differently today? I don't believe so. Torah is still widely learned as an academic exercise, a way to create Sugyas, to create halacha, to create chumras. In all my time in Yeshiva, one person who got Semicha there actually came out the way a Ben-Torah should come out. He is compassionate, caring, and an all around great person. Truly a Tzadik who cares about his fellow Jews.

I know I'm being harsh, but it's so disheartening to see that there has been no advancement toward the Geulah Shleima - the completed Geulah.

There is a Memra (saying) that Moshiach will only come when Bnai Yisrael are all Chayavim or all Zakaim. One of my rabbeim in high school once told me a beautiful spin on this saying that is very relevant to the state of the Jewish people today. He said chayavim doesn't necessarily mean everyone is sinful and zakaim doesn't necessarily mean everyone only does Mitzvos. Rather, this is a state of mind.

Zakaim means that I can be Litvish, someone else Chasidish, another Mizrachi, and yet another Sefardi, any one of an infinite number of chasidish groups, Yeshivish, or any other kind of Halacha following Judaism and in this huge fray, everyone gets along, loves another, respects one another, and acknowledges that, while they each have different minhagim or even follow certain different Halachos, Shiv'im Panim LaTorah, there are many ways to be a Torah observant Jew. This would be a utopia, and the ultimate in what it means to be a Jew - B'lev Echad K'Ish Echad - One Nation - Hashem's Nation.

The other side of the coin is not so rosy and is, unfortunately, what we have today: chayavim. In this case it means - Reuvain is Yeshivish, Shimon is Mizrachi, Levi is Chasidish, etc. and each one says the others are not practicing the "Emes" (whatever that means), that the others are not only not practicing Halachic Judaism, but even worse, it's not even kosher to daven in the others' shuls.

I'm not going to sit here and write what group does what and how they act, though I could tell incidents that would shock and despair. Doing so would make me just as guilty as what I am accusing these groups of doing. Rather I would say - be careful when judging another type of Yiddishkeit. If they are following Halacha, then they are following Halacha. What gives anyone else the right to judge anyone else based on a different set of minhagim or a different opinion of what the halacha is. A good example: Ashkenazim do not eat kitniyos on Pesach, while Sefardim do. Does this mean, from the Ashkenazik point of view, that Sefardim eat Chametz on Pesach? I've heard it said yes. This also goes for the minhag of not eating Gebrokhts on Pesach.

Moshiach will only come when we are all Zakai or all Chayav. We are an Am Kshe Oref, aren't we? In 2000 years, we've refused to change our ways, to show Ahavas Chinam, even in a place where Ahava isn't necessarily warranted. The question is, how does one feel any kind of Ahava toward someone who makes you pasul just because you don't do as they do?