Finally, the Health Insurance Companies Get It ALL :(

Yes. Life is a pre-existing condition! I'm waiting for this to actually happen.

"Hello. You've reached Suckers' Insurance Company. None of your claims will be paid as you have a pre-existing condition that is automatic when you are born: From the moment of birth, you were already dying. Therefore, while you will continue to pay our premiums, we will not be able to pay any claims due to your pre-existing condition. No one is available to take your call as you are unimportant. Have a great day!" Ick.